facebook, thou art mine enemy!!!!

There are lots of things that could have made me feel old by now. Joe’s insistence on referring to the kids’ ages not in years but in years left before we lose them forever, that cracking sound in my knees as I fumble through a pilates lesson, or the fact that I don’t understand half of what is said on Mtv. But none of this phased me. What finally did it? Facebook! Dun-dun-duhhhh!!!
Fear of becoming technologically challenged ranks right up there with fear of being kidnapped by a toothless mountain man and being stored under his barn for 10 years.
I think of Joe’s parents, who at one point didn’t use their oven for 8 months because the cat walked across the controls and they couldn’t figure out how to reprogram it. At another time they didn’t watch satellite tv (but they did pay for it) for almost a year because they were waiting for Joe to visit and teach them how to use the remote. Jan still can’t answer her cell phone when it rings.
What happens when the kids are tech-savvy and I have no clue what they are up to in their computer, or phones, or whatever other technology has come out by then (thanks, Natalie for giving me more to worry about with that Youtube clip)? Shirine started me worrying about this topic when she commented on my complete inability to text message with my thumbs. I’ve been working on my thumb dexterity ever since.

I must conquer Facebook. I must. The very future of my children’s safety depends on it. If I can’t keep up with the times the odds are good that someday, not so far away, a grown man will show up at the door to pick up 14 year old Hannah Jane and when I say no way, she’ll inform me that I can’t stop her from leaving with her husband, and yes, mom, you can get married on-line now to people you have only met in chat rooms. And, yes, mom, he did look younger in his picture. Ahhhh!!!! The fear of it all!!! I must conquer Facebook!